


Dinner and a Show

by brotherfuckers



Series: Striderclan [75]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Birthday Sex, Incest, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Multi, Sibling Incest, Stridercest - Freeform, Threesome, Threesome - M/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-31
Updated: 2014-01-31
Packaged: 2018-01-10 14:46:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1160938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brotherfuckers/pseuds/brotherfuckers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The twins drag their guardians out to dinner at a fancy fondue place for D's birthday that ends up devolving like usual into shenanigans which conclude back at the apartment where Bro screws up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dinner and a Show

D sags in his seat as he hits yet another red light. It must be a new record. It has to be. He didn’t even know there were this many red lights between the airport and the apartment, but he has to have hit every single one of them.

All he wants to do is get home and melt out of his clothes and onto the futon. Maybe have a brother or two take care of him. And by take care of him he means fuck him until he forgets that it’s his birthday. Because fuck getting older.

He managed to slip out of yet another birthday extravaganza in Hollywood despite his assistant almost managing to catch him in a surprise party. That would have ended poorly. Probably would have started poorly. And with blood. She apparently is unaware of how many sharp objects exist in his apartment.

Thankfully Logan tipped him off and D immediately made very vocal obvious plans to be home for his birthday and for the week after that. Possibly the month. Too bad not forever.

Though he supposes he could. He’s made enough money that he could coast for a good couple of years. And Bro is still raking in cash. And his little brothers will soon drop off of his expenses. He could easily go into early retirement and end up playing golf or knitting or winning bingo or taking up church.

And then he would go out of his frickin mind with boredom. Bro would kick him out of the apartment with some reason between moping around and pestering him about other creative ideas that he didn’t have a good outlet for.

D sighs and slumps down farther in his seat with that train of thought as he hits yet another fucking red light.

* * *

“Bro. You have to get dressed.”

“I dun wanna,” Bro whines, flopped out over the futon with just a towel across his waist. His hair is damp from his the recent shower and not even styled. The suit that Dirk had laid out for him on the desk chair remains untouched even as Dirk and Dave make sure each other’s ties are straight.

Bro, I can not hold him off any longer without seriously disrupting traffic patterns which will cause you all to be late to your reservations.

“Bro, I will dress you up in a fucking chastity belt if you don’t but on your nice clothes for D.”

Dave waves off Dirk’s threats and leans down to Bro’s ear. “Daddy, play nice and I’ll play with you afterwards.”

“Fuckin’ not fair,” Bro grumbles into the cushions before heaving himself up with a groan of immense effort.

“I don’t even want to know what you just promised him. But you have-”

Seven minutes and twenty three seconds.

“-before D gets here.”

* * *

D pulls into the lot with a tired sigh. He could come back for his suitcase later right? He grabs his briefcase anyways and eyes the elevator as he heads for the stairs.

“Fucking elevator of doom. Should get Dirk to fix it. Should get Hal to run it. But no. They say it’s possessed. Who the fuck would possess an elevator? Fucking satan box. And they just look at me funny when I say I know a priest and just tell me to take the stairs. Well fuck the stairs. FUCK THE STAIRS!” His voice echos up the stairwell, sounding just as tired as he feels. “Fuck.”

* * *

“What was that noise?”

“Maybe the elevator ghost finally decided to let it fall.”

“Bro, no talking, only dressing.”

“I am, I am.”

“Here, let me do your tie, you big oaf.”

* * *

“I hate these stairs. I hate this apartment. I hate Hollywood. I want to live on an island. A tropical island with lots of shade and pretty girls who bring me pina coladas as I swing in a hammock without any nosy assistants or obnoxious brats or asshole brothers or stuck up actors trying to hit on me like that would somehow magical bestow them with acting ability or make me hideously blind and deaf to their terrible skills that make me want to curl up and die inside every time I hold a fucking audition. My faith in humanity died on the stage. Shot, stabbed, hung, beheaded, burned, drowned, buried and lost to the tombs of Coach and Prada. Speaking of, I am going to burn these shoes when I get to the apartment. And this fucking monkey su-”

His rambling cuts off as he opens the apartment door and three well dressed Striders are standing there obviously waiting on him.

“GPS on the phone?”

“Yup. Hal tracked you,” Dave answers.

“Black tie affair?”

“You are already dressed for it,” Dirk points out.

“I know and I kinda hate myself for it. No getting out of it?”

“Not a chance since the brats somehow managed to stuff me into this,” Bro complains.

“Not our fault you ate the entire pizza last night.” Dave takes D’s briefcase and puts it inside as Dirk shuffles the rest of them out the door and locks it behind them.

“It woulda gone bad.”

“We have a fucking refrigerator for a reason.”

“It’s full of swords.”

“I fucking wonder why.” Both twins glare at Bro.

“Someone is carrying me down all these stairs I just fucking climbed.”

* * *

The place they come to is not nearly black tie formal and D kinda hates everyone. They still manage to get him out of the car and into the restaurant. Okay, it’s a little nicer on the inside than it looked like on the outside, D admits, but still not enough to put up with his suffering.

Dirk sneaks him a quick kiss and promises him that the after dinner activities will totally make up for it. D stifles his groan with a cough and is glad the lighting is dim enough to hide his blush.

Dave handles talking to the hostess who stares at the four well dressed attractive men standing in front of her and then blushes hard enough to see even in the light as Dave recaptures her attention with a flirt. They are led to the round booth in quick order. They slide in as the menus are slid across the table.

“Wha’s this place ‘gain?” Bro asks as he squints at the menus.

“Fondue.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Don’t you worry, Bro, we’ll take good care of you.” Bro glares at Dave’s saccharine tone. He doesn’t get a chance to retaliate as their waiter approaches with water and the specials. True to his word though, Dirk and Dave order for the group, picking out a wine for their older brothers to go with complementary flavors of cheese, broth, and food. Conversation flows between them as D catches them up on Hollywood happenings and they catch him up on Houston. It’s mostly the same complaints from D with just a different movie title and a couple different names thrown in. Dirk tells him about the robotic competition that he’s gearing up for. Dave’s teacher actually submitted one of his essays to a respectable magazine and they are going to publish him in the next couple of weeks. Bro’s just happy to see his brothers together, the sap.

The wine comes out and D drinks his first glass embarrassingly fast but the brothers don’t comment on it; they just pour him another. Then the cheese pot comes out with a plate of bread and eight long sticks with prongs at the end. Dave immediately snatches up the pink and red tipped ones and Dirk grabs the orange and green. D shrugs and takes the white and purple, passing Bro the black and blue ones. Bro takes them and then stares at them. He waves them around a bit like he is considering them as weapons.

“Da fuck are these for?” He watches his brothers carefully as they go ahead and start eating without him, using the prongs to dip the bread into the cheese. “We gotta stab our food ourselves?”

“Yes, Bro. You do. You normally stab your food. It’s just shaped differently from a fork.”

“Oh. Shuddup.” He tries to reach over to the bread plate and then stops and adjusts the pull on his suit and then gets to the food, loading both skewers up with bread before dunking them into the cheese.

“No wonder the suit’s tight on you.”

“Didn’t I tell ya to shuddup?”

“Just saying.”

“Ya still ain’t shuttin’ up,” Bro glowers over his brother.

“Nope.” Bro kicks at Dirk under the table until he catches D’s glare.

Conversation slows as it is broken up with bites of food. D and Dave spar a bit with their skewers over the last piece of bread before it is stolen by Dirk who bypasses the cheese to stuff it right into his mouth to prevent its second theft. D and Dave stare betrayal at Dirk’s smug grin.

The broth and plate of meats and vegetables come out next as the cheese and empty bread plate are taken away. Once again Bro develops a frown on his face.

“Wait. We gotta cook the food ourselves too?”

“Yes, Bro.”

“How much are we payin’ for this bullshit?”

“Hush, Bro. Just enjoy your food.”

Once again conversation is sporadic, limited to the periods between letting the food cook in the broth and then fishing the pieces out when they of course where knocked off of their skewers. Several of the pieces that Dirk goes for are whisked away before he can stab them in retribution for stealing the bread. Dirk really can’t complain because as the level of wine drops in the bottle, D’s hand creeps higher up on his thigh.

And he knows the next dish coming out.

Bro’s jaw drops as the chocolate pot comes out with a plate of strawberries, angel food cake, raspberries, pound cake, bananas, etc. “Aight, officially buyin’ a fondue set for the apartment.” He waits for the waiter to leave before making the next comment, “Do y’all know what we could do with melted chocolate?”

“You are not getting scalding hot ANYTHING near my dick or nipples.”

“But Davey, ya like pain.”

“And I also like not having to go to the ER for molten chocolate dick,” Dave stubbornly argues.

“Why would you waste good chocolate by making it too salty on a sexy brother’s body?”

“Haven’t y’all seen the new fad for salted chocolate?” Bro throws out there but gets a pair of dead eye looks back at him. “Well fine then.”

“Well, actually, that does give me some ideas for chocolate syrup and whipped cream,” Dirk muses out loud, “But we can use hershey's for that and save Dave’s precious little dick.”

“I do not have a little dick. I am the same size as you. We are frigging twins.”

“Want to pull them out and measure them?”

“What?! No! We’re at a restaurant, Dirk!”

“D seems to be having trouble with that, seeing as he has his hand in my pants right now.”

Bro nearly spits out his strawberry. Then he looks over at Dave who quickly picks up on the sultry eyebrow waggle.

“Oh no. No no no.”

“Can’t let them outdo us now, Davey.”

Dave brandishes the skewer in front of him. “No. No, fuck you, no. I want fondue and only fondue right now. I swear I will pour this pot of molten deliciousness on your lap and test out how bad of an idea sexy play with this shit is if you get between me and this heavenly chocolate bliss with your fucking libido.”

“Goddamn what a spoilsport.”

Dave makes loud strangled noises of frustration before scooting away from him and diving into the chocolate himself.

“Hey Bro, mind finishing off the wine before D has the rest of it? Because at this rate, he’s going to slip under the table and get really frisky. Except really one of us should be offering to do that to D since it is his birthday.”

“Not it,” Dave calls around a mouthful of chocolate covered cake.

“I’d totally be up for that, ‘cept I can barely move in the suit. Feel like I’ma tear outta it.”

“Again with the suit. If you wreck it, you’re dead,” Dirk threatens.

“You are going to need to lay off the beer,” Dave echoes.

“How about I just up the number of ass whoopin’s, I mean, strifes to make up for it?” Bro pinches at Dave making him knock into D, making D knock into Dirk. But D makes no move to straighten himself back up. Instead he leans in and licks a stripe up Dirk’s neck making him freeze up in the middle of lifting a piece of dessert up.

“D? What are you doing?”

“Yummy.”

“D, I am not dessert.” He just gets another lick. Dirk rolls his eyes and shoves the chocolatey bite into his mouth. With continued pressure Dirk pushes D back upright into his seat properly and then leans in. “I am not dessert but you might get some in the car if you behave.” He pushes D’s hand away to emphasize his words.

“Yummy.” D parries around Dirk’s blocking hand and grabs Dirk’s cock again, a little bit harsher this time which makes Dirk twitch in surprise.

“D. No.” Dirk’s voice is firm which makes D freeze up this time. “D, you need to behave. You need to obey or I won’t fuck you in the back seat of the car like you want.” A pitiful whine builds up in his throat. “You behave and you’ll get to be in the middle of your birthday orgy when you get home. You’ll have Bro riding your ass and Dave sucking your dick and my dick dangling in front of your whorish open mouth as you beg for me between gasps.” D’s mouth falls open just like Dirk was describing as he lets go of Dirk’s cock enough that Dirk can block him with his hand again. His other hand goes to pick up a strawberry and hold it out for D to bite. “Are you going to behave, D?”

“Yessir.” Dirk pushes the strawberry into his mouth.

Bro and Dave just stare at the scene across from them. “Hot.” They both shift as their pants are tight and they try to distract themselves with more dessert. Three out of four brothers wonder how they are going to get out of the restaurant without embarrassing themselves with a set of four matching boners.

It is no small feat in the end but the bickering over who is grabbing the check does help a bit. Boners are almost instantly restored when they get out to the car when D grabs Dirk and pulls him into the back seat. Dave and Bro just roll their eyes and climb into the front seat. Bro unabashedly watches the pair writhing and grinding against each other as he berates Dave about keeping his eyes on the road. Dave actually curses Bro for not doing his usual asshole stunt of molesting him as he drives as quickly as possible home. He listens to D get off at least once, judging by the volume of his moans, before he pulls into their apartment parking lot.

Dave and Bro are both achingly hard as they drag their brothers out of the car. It is a stumbling race up the stairs to the apartment. There is groping, kissing and fumbling of buttons as soon as the door is locked.

“We need to have birthdays more often if y’all are gonna get this riled up. Why do ya brats have to share a birthday, greedy bastards?”

“Shut up and get naked.”

“I would but this frickin’ suit- ARG!” Bro suddenly arches his back, stretching the fabric until the stitches start popping and then tearing. The other brothers stop and stare at Bro, watching the gaps in the jacket show the white of the shirt underneath and then the shirt underneath ripping to show skin. Once he can stretch it no more, he stands back up. “Ah, much better.”

“Holy shit.” The expletive falls from Dirk’s hanging mouth. “You murdered it. It had a family and a dog and a decent job and it was just two days from retirement and you fucking killed it. You monster. Do you realize how much that suit cost?”

“It didn’t fit.” Bro shrugs and starts to take the ruined fabric off.

“No. You don’t seem to realize. It was a very nice thousand dollar suit and you just hulked through it like it was tissue paper because it was a little tight because you’ve been marathoning junk food like the twinkie was going out of business. Again.” Dirk’s tone is flat and bland and therefore very dangerous.

“Thousand dollar?” Bro holds up the tattered jacket. “Who the fuck pays a thousand dollars for a suit? Oh well.”

“No. This isn’t an ‘oh well’.” Dirk stalks towards Bro who actually takes a step back away from his blank face. “This is so not an ‘oh well’ situation.” Another step back. “This is an ‘oh shit’ situation for you.” Another step. “You’ve fucked up.” Dirk shoves him and Bro falls back onto the futon. He’s so startled by the chain of events that it’s not until he hears the click of the cuffs that he realizes that Dave and D had moved and that he needs to struggle. Of course, by then it was too late. His flailing legs don’t help when there are three brothers sitting on them and locking restraints around his ankles. He checks the strength of the chains but they hold true. He relaxes into the futon, trying not to grin, ready to take his ‘punishment’ from his three sexy brothers looking perfectly mussed up in their suits.

His hidden grin turns to an expression of confusion then dismay and horror as the three pull away from the futon and then disappear into the twins’ bedroom, leaving him fully dressed and with an erection that won’t die, especially as he can hear the actions of the others. They are cruel enough to leave the door open.

He hears the rustling of clothes rise and then fade as they strip, presumably in a manner that preserved their clothes instead of ruining them. Then he hears the soft smacking of kissing and more, flesh on flesh, and the groan of the bed springs. He hears the simultaneous gasps of Dave and D and Bro’s torture is worsened by the image of Dirk prepping them together. His train of thought is confirmed when he hears moans from Dave and a sigh from D and then moments later echoing moans from D and a sigh from Dirk.

Bro moans out loud with an exasperated note.

“Bro, don’t make me come in there and gag you,” Dirk threatens, his voice a touch breathless in a way that makes Bro actually regret his actions for once. He hopes that his brothers will find mercy in their hearts eventually.

* * *

Dirk catches the door as Dave tries to close it behind him. Dave tilts his head in confusion but Dirk just shoves him at D who is already halfway undressed. Dave soon forgets the issue in favor of helping D get all the way naked, sprinkling kisses down his torso as he goes. Fabric flutters away from their bodies as all three strip down before Dave pulls D onto the bed. Dirk leans back and admires the way his two brothers look together as they kiss and grind. Dave’s hands grope D’s ass as D props himself up over his younger look-a-like.

Dirk grabs the lube from the nightstand before climbing onto the bed behind them. He pushes Dave’s legs apart which in turn spreads D’s legs a little bit wider. Dirk puts the current view somewhere in the top ten sexiest things he has ever seen.

But this isn’t a spectator sport he reminds himself. He uncaps the lube and pours some on D’s exposed ass and some onto his fingers before recapping it and tossing it to the side. His messy fingers go to Dave’s ass and his clean fingers get messy on D’s ass. They moan together into his touch as he pushes the lube around and massages the puckered skin. He notices that D is quivering with restraint, holding still for Dirk instead of grinding his hanging, swollen, dripping dick against Dave’s smaller one beneath him. Dave has noticeably less restraint as his hips buck up as if trying to coax Dirk’s fingers into more and making the tip of D’s cock brush against his weeping head.

Dirk takes mercy on his twin and gently presses in at the same time, earning gasps from both of the Striders in front of him. The first finger slides in easily. The second as well. D’s resolve crumbles and he pushes himself back against Dirk’s fingers, bodily demanding more even as his mouth is busy sucking marks into Dave’s neck and collarbone. Dirk smiles and gives D what he wants, including Dave too. He speeds up the pace of his finger fucking until D is rutting into the air above Dave and moaning like the whore that Dave tells him he is. The third fingers gets more gasps and pleas for something more.

Dirk decides that since it is D’s birthday celebration that he gets the royal treatment. He slips his fingers out of Dave and the smears the extra lube on his hand on D’s cock, fingering and jerking him off at the same time. The dual stimulation plus Dave’s constant dirty muttering make D arch over his younger brother as he quickly reaches the edge of pleasure.

Then it’s all gone as the twins recognize the signs and stop just as D feels like he’s going to burst. D let’s out a high keen at the sudden emptiness and silence. The twins let him calm down, Dave gently running a hand through his sweaty hair as he pants heavily.

“Please, Dirk, Dave, please,” D begs softly when he’s no longer wound tight with a hair trigger.

Dirk doesn’t answer. Instead he rearranges D’s legs to be inside of Dave’s and pulls his hips back. Then with a gentle hand he guides D’s cock to Dave’s entrance. Dave tilts his hips up to give him better access. Then Dave moans and D sighs as Dirk pushes down on his hips, forcing him into his brother. Dirk doesn’t stop there; while D is still pinned, Dirk move up close and presses himself into D making him change from a sigh to a moan.

D’s eyes rolls back into his head at the combination of having such a tight heat wrapped around his cock in front and a mirrored heat filling him up from behind. The twins both use their hands over his body to sooth him as everyone becomes adjusted.

They hear Bro moan loudly from the other room, obviously wanting to join in.

“Bro, don’t make me come in there and gag you,” Dirk threatens.

Dave is the first to move, rocking his hips up towards D, pushing him a bit back onto Dirk. Then Dirk thrusts shallowly forward, driving D further into Dave. If D was able to make a coherent thought, he would have sworn that it was a freaky twin thing how fast the two of them fell into a rhythm of pushing and pulling him between them.

D’s moans are definitely the loudest but for good reason as he is the cream filling of this Strider sandwich. As he pulls out of Dave, Dirk is pushing in. When Dirk is pulling out, he’s pushing into Dave. Dirk’s heavy breathing is directly in his ear and he watches Dave arch up against the bed with such a pretty flush across his face.

“Come on, Dave. Put some effort into fucking the birthday slut.” The hardness in Dirk’s voice only enhances the effect of the dirty talk on D whose sounds jump up another decibel.

“D! D! Please! Please touch me!” Dave’s hands are all over D’s chest, feeling his muscles up and tweaking his nipples and earning different noises as he experiments. But for as much as he is touching D, no one is touching him and his cock is feeling as lonely as Bro, it being the only one in the room not in use. “D! Jerk me off, tug my cock, give me something, just fucking touch me!”

“Don’t touch him,” Dirk growls into D’s ear as D shifts to free up a hand. D of course immediately stops and Dave lets out a pitiful whine.

“Dirk, Dirk, please! I’m begging you! I need it!”

“Oh no you don’t, Dave. You’ve got birthday boy’s dick. It would be a shame to waste such a present right?” D shivers at Dirk’s tone, the control heavy and smooth despite his non-stop fucking. “Plus, Dave, we’ve seen you come before without being touched.” Dave whines again. “D, you can’t touch his cock but feel free to pull his hair and treat him rough.”

D doesn’t move to do that as he’s too focused trying not to come just yet.

“Do you need me to instruct you, D?” Dirk’s voice is dark purr and makes D shudder. “Come on now, put the bitch in his place.” D’s hand darts to Dave’s hair, grabbing it harshly and pulling it back. Dave’s head tilts up with a gasp. “Good boy, D. Now give him some teeth.” D leans down to Dave’s exposed neck and starts kissing and sucking at it. “I said bite him,” Dirk growls.

As D’s teeth first graze the skin and then nip gently at the soft skin, Dave arches up. As D’s bites get rougher and harder, almost to the point that Dave is sure that they have drawn blood, Dave is absolutely writhing. His hands are scrabbling against the fitted sheets on the bed looking for a place to hold onto because he knows better than to break the unspoken rule of him obviously being disallowed to jerk himself off. He does not want to end up like Bro in the other room.

“Oh my fuck! Oh fuck! Shit fuck! D! Dirk!”

As much as he is just following his dom’s commands, D really enjoys watching Dave unravel beneath him and being a part of the reason why. Dirk makes sure his hips don’t slow, even as Dave’s pace gets erratic. Dirk just fucks him harder, driving him into Dave, basically fucking his twin through his older brother.

“Good boy, D. Just a bit more,” Dirk’s voice is rough and warm and D tastes copper. Dave screams as he comes; he clenches down on D just as Dirk slams into him. D is dragged over the edge as well, releasing Dave’s shoulder with his own cry of pleasure. Of course having both brothers come beneath him doesn’t do anything for Dirk’s control and it’s only a couple more pumps of his hips into D’s convulsing body before he’s coming as well.

It’s a messy sweaty collapse of bodies. Dave manages a squawk with the last bit of air from his lungs to warn the others about his impending suffocation so that they know to roll over to the side. Dave is pulled along with them keeping the D sandwich still intact.

D’s arms wrap around Dave and he kisses gently at all of the marks he made. Dirk cards his hand through D’s hair as their collective breathing calms down.

“Didn’t know you had it in you, D,” Dave mumbles.

“Well... I had a bit of Dirk in me.”

“Literally,” Dirk adds. They all snicker at the pun. They hear Bro groan from the other room and laugh again.

“What should we do with the asshole?” Dave asks.

“I’ll take care of him,” D answers, “But nap first.”

* * *

Bro’s given up all hope when he hears his brothers orgasm in succession, laugh, and then fall silent. For someone who lives without regrets, Bro rues his impulsive destruction of the suit. Bro doesn’t go for the hard to reach release mechanisms, submitting to his purgatory. He slips into a comfortable doze in the silence.

He’s woken by a gentle touch moments before D slips over his thighs to straddle him. D makes quick work of his pants, shoving the cloth down as far as he can. D gives him a couple quick strokes to wake him up fully before moving up over his hips. The tip of Bro’s burgeoning erection brushes the apex between D’s thighs and comes away wet. Bro groans and throws his head back. D follows him, leaning over low so that his lips are close to Bro’s ears.

“It’s my birthday and I was promised a ride. But I want your filthiest dirty talk while I take it.”  

“Holy shit, D. Mercy has never been so sexy.”

“Whore. Call me a whore, Bro.”

“You absolute slut.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> For more information please check out our work at striderclan.tumblr.com; we have more stories, head canons, art/pictures.


End file.
